brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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