Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize