I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize