I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
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