Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(602): View more from Arizona

I just woke up to me licking the dognuts

(623): View more from Arizona

You mean Doughnuts?

(602): View more from Arizona

......No :(

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(602): I just woke up to me licking the dognuts (623): You mean Doughnuts? (602): ......No :( http://tfl.nu/8azm

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(864): View more from South Carolina

long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".

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(864): long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube". http://tfl.nu/njsb

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(386): View more from Florida

Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.

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(386): Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go. http://tfl.nu/vo4f

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...

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(978): Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested... http://tfl.nu/1qsg

Replies (9) Good night (3907) Bad night (1061) Order T-Shirt
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(612): View more from Minnesota

Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me

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(612): Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me http://tfl.nu/r7ma

Replies (17) Good night (844) Bad night (1922) Order T-Shirt
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(310): View more from California

Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.

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(310): Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate. http://tfl.nu/vwb7

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(408): View more from California

Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos

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(408): Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos http://tfl.nu/v3p3

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(573): View more from Missouri

I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this

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(573): I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this http://tfl.nu/fiy0

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(207): View more from Maine

Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?

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(207): Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims? http://tfl.nu/se1q

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(847): View more from Illinois

Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.

(314): View more from Missouri

Come down off the roof.

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(847): Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go. (314): Come down off the roof. http://tfl.nu/d3mp

Replies (3) Good night (1852) Bad night (558)
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(217): View more from Illinois

I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?

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(217): I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet? http://tfl.nu/vpwn

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(919): View more from North Carolina

He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.

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(919): He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP. http://tfl.nu/0m9q

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(479): View more from Arkansas

I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.

(870): View more from Arkansas

Birthday success

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(479): I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick. (870): Birthday success http://tfl.nu/9sf8

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(817): View more from Texas

Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.

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(817): Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one. http://tfl.nu/mit2

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(313): View more from Michigan

Why are you there anyways?

(248): View more from Michigan

Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist

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(313): Why are you there anyways? (248): Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist http://tfl.nu/9tvc

Replies (4) Good night (653) Bad night (186)

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