? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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