ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
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This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
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