I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize