Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
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