You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize