An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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