We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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