question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize