his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
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Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
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Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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