I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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