the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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