hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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