Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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