question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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