Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize