I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
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