i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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