How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
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he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
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