I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize