We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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