Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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