I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Just pee around me
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize