I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
only you would photoshop your dick
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
i've created a new STD.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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