Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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