this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize