In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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