we're chasing vodka with high fives
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
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he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
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Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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