She's JV to your varsity
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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