so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize