she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize