It's just like the Real World with babies
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize