Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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