All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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