my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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