Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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