i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize