Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
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