so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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