so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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