We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize