is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Oh god it's open bar.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize