but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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