yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
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its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
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I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
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