shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
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