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Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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